Billy Strings Says He’s Still in ‘Denial’ Over His Mom’s ‘Unnecessary’ Cause of Death

Billy Strings thought the worst of his mother’s struggle with drug addiction was behind her. So when she died of methamphetamine intoxication in June, it threw the bluegrass star for a loop.

Strings, 33, opened up about losing his mother Debra Apostol in a new episode of the Dopey podcast, saying her sudden death at age 64 on June 20 left him shocked and devastated.

“It’s not her fault. She lost a battle… [but] I still get angry sometimes,” he said. “I was f—–g pissed. To me it was just so f—–g stupid.. Really? This is how my mom f—–g dies? This is f—–g stupid, man. It was just unnecessary. Didn’t need to happen.”

The “Gild the Lily” singer — who struggled with his own addiction issues in the past — lost his biological father to a heroin overdose when he was 2 years old. While growing up, his mother dealt with drug addiction, too, but Strings said she’d been “perfectly healthy” as of late, and he “never once was worried about her,” despite the fact that her husband was dealing with health issues.

“For a second there, I really didn’t know what the f–k happened, and I didn’t know how this all went down. I still don’t, really. I don’t understand,” he said. “I guess I never will, and I need to just f—–g let it go. But we’re all sitting around [saying], ‘Oh man, I wonder if it was an aneurysm. I wonder if it was a heart attack. Think she had a blood clot? Oh man, wow, she just died like that. Wow, that’s crazy.’”

Strings said that he was on tour in Australia when his mother’s death certificate was sent to his email, revealing the devastating truth: she’d died of methamphetamine intoxication.

“I didn’t know that she was using,” he said. “I was in denial even before that, like, ‘Yeah, it ain’t gonna be nothing like that, you know what I mean? It’s gonna be some crazy thing’… My mom wouldn’t do that. I want to believe that she wouldn’t do that.”

He said that had he known she was using drugs, he would’ve done his best to get her into rehab, but understands that it was largely out of his control, and his mother “would’ve got dope no matter what.”

The “Dust in a Baggie” singer, who is a father to 14-month-old son River with his wife Ally, explained that losing Debra made him re-think what he thought he knew about addiction, and that he now understands that she had an illness that was beyond her control.

“Since she died, I’ve just had this whole realization of how much she really did love me and how much good times we did have together and how amazing of a woman she really was. I’ve leaned in to all that,” he said, adding that he’s dropped in on some Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, and has been comforted hearing other people share their stories of loving someone in the throes of addiction.

Strings also explained why he decided to play a concert in Lexington, Kentucky the day his mother died, saying he didn’t want to disappoint young fans who’d come out to see him — and it was what Debra would have wanted.

He described the show — during which he told the crowd what had happened in an emotional moment — as being “very cathartic.”

“I felt like I was playing her home,” he said. “Playing with the bravery of a son to defend his mother’s spirit as it makes its journey.”

Strings said he’s currently working on turning Debra’s poetry into an album that he hopes will honor her. He marked her birthday on Oct. 31 with a sweet Instagram post that featured a slideshow of photos with the caption, “Happy Birthday momma ❤️”

His most recent record, Highway Prayers, is up for Best Bluegrass Album at the 2026 Grammys.

If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, please contact the SAMHSA helpline at 1-800-662-HELP.